truTV: Not Reality. Actuality.

In July, a California appeals court rejected the challenge of Nizameddine Chokr, 51, leaving in place his five-year-plus sentence for repeatedly masturbating in public. However, Chokr, a suede-pants-wearing, facially discomforting, secret FBI agent (according to him), shamelessly lamented that women are constantly demanding sex from him, leading him once to proclaim in court, "I am the best ever." He termed one of the masturbation episodes (according to a July Orange County Weekly report) an "involuntary" discharge and expressed confusion why patrons in Angelo's Hamburgers restaurant would scream when he unzipped to clean himself. In another incident, he said he tried mightily to resist two women who picked him up at a bus stop, but said he had to accede to their sexual demands lest they file bogus criminal charges.

Florida state Rep. Bob Allen was a co-sponsor earlier in 2007 of legislation to increase the penalty for "public lewdness and indecent exposure," such as trolling for sex partners in public restrooms (upping the crime from a misdemeanor to a felony). The bill did not pass, which was lucky for Rep. Allen, who was arrested in July in a men's room in Titusville when undercover officers said he entered and exited three times in the space of a few minutes, peered over a restroom stall and offered oral sex for $20.

Florida state Rep. Bob Allen was a co-sponsor earlier in 2007 of legislation to increase the penalty for "public lewdness and indecent exposure," such as trolling for sex partners in public restrooms (upping the crime from a misdemeanor to a felony). The bill did not pass, which was lucky for Rep. Allen, who was arrested in July in a men's room in Titusville when undercover officers said he entered and exited three times in the space of a few minutes, peered over a restroom stall, and offered oral sex for $20.

Aaron Meinhardt, 37, was arrested in Riverside, Mo., in July after a municipal swimming pool employee saw him expose himself. The arresting officer said Meinhardt asked him, "Am I

Aaron Meinhardt, 37, was arrested in Riverside, Mo., in July after a municipal swimming pool employee saw him expose himself. The arresting officer said Meinhardt asked him, "Am I (not) allowed to satisfy myself? It has been a long time since I have. What am I supposed to do, just keep it in?"

Just Can't Stop Myself: Kylie Wilson, 28, was convicted in June in Brisbane, Australia, of stabbing her friend Daniel Blair because Blair literally would not stop masturbating in her home, where Wilson's three-year-old daughter was present. According to Wilson, Blair started his adventure in the bathroom and moved to the bedroom, ignoring Wilson's pleas, until she grabbed a knife and stabbed him twice in the shoulder. Even then, the wounded Blair merely retreated to the garage, where he continued what a newspaper called his "marathon."