An 81-year-old Riverside, Illinois, mother could have really used some sort of medical alert bracelet or necklace on March 9, 2013, when her drunken son, Robert Golba, 55, fell on her during an argument, and passed out.

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Any Americans on British Airways flight BA2202 from Cancun to London who boarded under the misconception that “‘the British are all polite,” were quickly and perhaps a little brutally disabused of that notion after encountering very drunk fellow passenger Sean Jude Kelly.

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A St. Louis man was stabbed recently in the chest, back and neck, but was so drunk he never realized and couldn’t remember the incident. Also a sober Canadian man found a knife blade in his back from an assault that occurred three years ago.

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Sean Payne, 35, was arrested in Humble, Texas, in the wee hours of the morning of October 4th, after police received a call from pub employees about Payne’s drunken behavior. Taken into custody on a charge of public intoxication, he was reportedly too drunk to hold up his head

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A woman was enjoying her evening at a Shooters Grill and Bar in Boulder, Colo., when Timothy Paez sidled up to her and slipped his arm around her. She expressed her disinterest in his advances, and he expressed his dismay — by peeing on her leg.

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In a standoff with police that lasted hours, a man with a history of police standoffs in several states issued some odd demands.

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When asked what had happened Patricia Maione reportedly said that her GPS had told her to turn left into a ‘cornfield,’ and that once she was in the ‘cornfield’ she could not find her way out, adding that she doesn’t even like golf. Turns out alcohol was involved.

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It was June 12, 2012, and Ohio man Charles Swinney, 43, needed a pedicure, desperately, it seems. Carrying a duffel bag, he entered the Asian Nails salon in Mentor, Ohio, which was about to close, and announced that he needed a pedicure.

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Michigan man Raymond Kulma, 55, was arrested on May 27 after assaulting a man at a senior living facility, stealing his motorized wheelchair and taking it out for a spin.

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Zoey Ripple, 21, of Boulder, Colo., drunkenly made her way into what she claims she thought was a friend’s house on May 23, 2012. Ripple claims to have said “hello” on entering the darkened bedroom. She also said she felt “confused.” That’s when homeowner Timothy Justice shot her in the side.

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