The town of La Quebrada, about two hours south of Lima, will not be hosting it’s annual La Festival Gastronomico del Gato (The Gastronimic Festival of the Cat) after a judge decided to put a stop to the town’s feline feast held in honor of St. Iphigenia.
It seems that authorities in Florida have nothing better to do than ticket handicapped pussycats frolicking in the grass. It’s bad enough that they have clawed, aggressive ducks attacking the elderly at ponds, Diamondback rattlesnakes biting turtle rescuers and large pythons slithering around eating two cats at a time, but disabled pets must be leashed.
So what do you do when you sober up only to find that the cute stray cat you thought you were rescuing on your way home last night actually has a collar, a name and probably a worried owner? Why, feed the cat cheese and place the following ad on Craigslist, of course.
The 16-year mayor of Talkeetna, Alaska, a cat named Stubbs, has been seriously injured in an attack by a local dog. It is not known what provoked the attack, but Stubb’s owner says that the mayor is in a lot of pain. It is not known if he was planning a bid for the White House in 2016.
In a breakthrough moment in the history of criminal investigation, police in England solved a murder with the help of a shiny new DNA database of British felines — yup, the bad guy was collared by his own cat’s fur.
Idaho man Ryan Tannenholz, a self-described “furry,” has been arrested on charges that he sexually penetrated a cat on several occasions between January 2012 and January 2013. Thankfully details released in the case are scant.
In an assault case that still has cops in Oklahoma City scratching their heads, a young woman was arrested for threatening her male 72-year-old neighbor, who she said told everyone that she had had sex with her cat. He had no idea what she was talking about, and police do not seem to have interviewed the cat.
New Zealand man Gavin Wilkinson may face charges after selling the skin of a purportedly feral cat he shot on his property in an online auction on May 30, 2013, on the website trademe.co.nz. Wilkinson claims to have shot the animal and killed it humanely after it killed his chickens. Though the local SPCA may not be not buying it, other people apparently are.
Cat lovers around the globe are thankful to Illinois authorities, who may just have prevented the perfect murder, saved the life of a presumed-innocent feline and convicted a budding criminal mastermind in the process.
Houston, Texas woman Audrey Deen Miller, 42, must have heard about the recent incident in Florida in which Michael Jones beat his girlfriend with her own dog, because when Miller’s husband threatened the cat, she was ready for him.