Reason #2: Sports fanatics celebrate athletic competition by stuffing their face holes full of the four food groups: cheesiness, crunchiness, meatiness, and chemicals.

There are two kinds of Super Bowl parties. The casual kind with nachos and hot dogs, where friends and family gather to chat, watch some ridiculous commercials and pay attention to the game when it gets good. Then there's the Super Bowl party that is a gluttonous feeding. A sick cross between a Thanksgiving feast bled of any meaning and a Roman Orgy without any of the sex. It's amazing that vomit buckets aren't a regular part of these chow marathons.