1. The "classic" hand turkey

Remember when you made hand turkeys in elementary school? Or rehab? Good times. There's just not enough arts and crafts in our modern world, which is why you should make your own homemade holiday decorations this Thanksgiving! All you need is some construction paper, crayons, vodka, imagination, vodka, and your own hand. Here are some totally dumb ideas for all-new grown-up hand turkeys. Decorate your studio apartment, prison cell, or hobo tent and have a happy Gobblepocalypse!

These hand turkeys are the work of a grown-ass man with way too much time on his hands.