Study: Beautiful women can be hazardous to a man's health
What it determined: Researchers at the University of Valencia in Spain found that one-on-one contact with an attractive female raises stress hormones to dangerously high levels. A group of 84 male students were tasked with solving a Sudoku puzzle while a gorgeous woman was in the room. Some men were so stressed out, their cortisol hormone levels reached that of a person diving out of a plane.
Why it's dumb: Who did the researchers bring in for this study, Sofia Vergara? Just how hard up are these guys that they can't solve a simple Sudoku while in the presence of a pretty face? Unless the woman was causing the guy's heart to burst out of his chest like a Tex Avery cartoon wolf, there's nothing proven here that a cold shower can't fix.