He's Not Dead
The first stage of grief is denial. There are many reasons to assume that Kim Jong-Il is not, in fact, actually dead. For one, the DPRK recently held a press conference in which they stated that Mr. Kim was slated to live for three more years. They are never wrong about things like that. He was also scheduled to officially turn over the reins of power to his youngest son and successor Kim Jong-Un in a public ceremony in 2012. But the most compelling evidence that Kim Jong-Il must be alive? Twilight: Breaking Dawn Part 2 won't be released until 16 November 2012 — movie buff Kim would never want to miss that cinematic event.